A man running through the crowded train looked very agitated, calling out, "Is there a Catholic Priest on board?!"

When he got no reply, he ran back up the train shouting, "Is there an Anglican Priest on board?!" Still there was no reply.

Now becoming very desperate, he ran down the train shouting, "Is there a Rabbi on board?"

Finally, a passenger jumped up and shouted, "Can I be of any assistance, my friend?!! I'm a Charismatic Pastor!!"

The agitated man paused, looked at him and said, "Sit down; you can’t help me. I need a corkscrew!"